jeezvanilla

016: SCARRED FOR LIFE

Adriana BelletComment

I had been geeking out on illustrators and photographers' zines for quite some time. Nevertheless I couldn’t quite find the right moment to do one of my own, that first zine seemed a daunting a task: what medium to illustrate with; which format; how many pages; how many copies; what printing technique to go for?

As it turned out, only the theme was a thought out matter, all the other questions found an answer pretty much on their own {coloured pencils; A5; 20 pages; 75 copies; digital printing}. It was the call for art of Light Grey Art Lab, the awesome Minneapolis based gallery, what made the whole difference. They proposed yet another great collaborative exhibition: Stacks, an ambitious time line of sorts that would capture the last 30 years through the eyes and the zines of 60-something artists, one year at a time. 

I saw it. I applied for it. I got in. I danced the conga. 

1990 was my year and movies my theme. Back then I was 6 and I believe I do remember some moments through that fog typical of the childhood days. I remember my best friend getting a baby sister, my dad crafting me some furry ears and a hanging tail for me to play the wolf in Little Red Ridding-hood at school (that trauma deserves its own blog post, btw) and the sweets that my mum would allow me after my piano lessons (yet another trauma in the making. The music lessons, not the chocolate!).  

But one of the things I remember the most is how much I loved watching movies already back then. I have a clear image of my feet at the end of the sofa and all the VHS lined up under the TV. We watched a fair amount of movies and for the most I understood from them that the grown up world was a mysterious yet exciting place. Not always, though. Certain movies just bothered or worried me. The curious thing its that they weren’t the particularly scary ones those which left a long lasting impression…

So, 24 years on, this is the zine that resulted: a collection of movies that came out in 1990 and that for some reason or another, they just traumatised me. A fun introspective exercise, word. 

If you happen to be around Minnesota before the 5th of September you can see it along some 60 other zines in the exhibition Stacks. Otherwise, the zine is also available for purchase on Light Grey Art Lab’s shop